Let us think

So, I have not been posting... and I keep saying to myself that I am too busy but that is a horrible excuse. Honestly, after camp I have been thinking and striving to do better as a person and I am posting tonight because I need to. Here I go... lets see what happens.

Tonight I fell, I stumbled... whatever you want to call it... I mean, when I got home I was so high on God, I thought it would never end... and then when I fell down from that high for a while, that is when the devil struck.. I sit here thinking to myself... why, why would I let this happen. Then I remember what my pastor said "Worship whenever." He said it is best to worship when we have fallen... so I sit.. and worship... and listen... and now I am blogging to let out what is in my head.

I was reading Psalm 5 so that is where all these quotes are gonna come from. You see, what I find interesting is, David just tells God what to do, he says "Listen to my cry for help, my King and my God." He is not being rude, he is just saying it... and I think we all need to say that. Because I needed help tonight... and I never got it.. but I never really asked. You see... when something overwhelms you like that... I mean, some drug addicts can't help themselves, and just like with drugs, pornography is addictive. And it hurts when you fall... I know I am getting better, but it's just when is that day gonna come that I don't have to fight it.

It says "You are not a God who takes pleasure in evil...You destroy those who tell lies..." yet it goes on to say "but I, by your great mercy will come into your house." I don't know about you but that is a breath of fresh air... and I can just say thank you God for that.

I could go on and on.. but this post is mainly for me... I am asking for prayer, for real! I need it... many do. I ask that you pray for all men and women who struggle with it... because its out there... so please pray! Please! this is not joke.... So I guess that is where I leave you all tonight... Just with the knowledge that it is only by grace that we get to come into God's house...

Goodnight everyone..